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How to make someone love you forever in 30 minutes or less

Yeah right! If you clicked on this article hoping to find magic words to say and make someone instantly fall in love with you or some kind of love spell to cast on that not-so-interested boy / man or girl / woman, I’m sorry to disappoint you.

I’m old school in this case. You can’t rush love. No, you just have to wait. Love is not easy. It is a game of give and take. You have to trust, give it time.

But how long does it take for someone to fall in love? And at what point do you say, “OMG! I can’t believe this is happening to me!”

Personally, I don’t think any “love expert” can tell you with 100% certainty how long it will take someone to fall in love. If someone tells you they know exactly how to make someone love you forever in 30 or even 90 minutes, get a hint. It’s Kool-Aid!

There is no magic number of minutes, weeks, months or years for people to fall in love. If we talk about attraction based on sexual chemistry, then scientists claim that it takes a man only 8.2 seconds to “fall madly in love”; and a woman 15 seconds to decide if she wants to fall in love or not.

Explain why I fell in love twice today: at the supermarket! One of the men asked me to marry him after only 60 seconds of meeting me. [O! Please. Don’t get any ideas, I am kidding. This woman is taken!]

The point I’m trying to make here is that we fell in love with someone we’ve known for a while. The process of “falling in love” happens in stages for most of us (with the exception of emotionally immature or sick people who fall in love with just about anyone, and too quickly).

The first stage of falling in love is the one I just mentioned above; one based on sexual chemistry. Keep in mind that “sexual” is not necessarily about “sex,” but rather about the energy that drives sexual attraction. The second stage is when we realize how unique and special the person is; and the third is when we have convinced ourselves that we are happier and more fulfilled with that person in our lives.

Most men stay too long (and some even get stuck) in the early stage of infatuation, while women tend to merge stages two and three into one, making it seem like women fall in love in just two stages. I guess the biological clock has something to do with it.

But even if no one can say with 100% certainty how long it will take someone to fall in love, there are words and other signs that tell you that a man or woman is falling in love with you.

Most people think that when the person says those three magic words “I love you”, then you know for sure that they are in love. I wrote an article titled “I love you” – How soon is too soon? “And what I said in summary is that each man or woman has their own different schedule to say” I love you. “A new person, while others prefer to wait a while to be 150% sure that they really love the person they are What these words are saying to you. And for some people, saying “I love you” is like saying “Thank you” or “Goodbye.” In other words, saying “I love you” does not always mean that someone is falling in love or is in love with you. .

I asked some of my clients to tell me when it was “they knew for sure” and here are some of their responses.

1. I knew it when we started calling each other every day. But more than that, I could hear in her voice that I was the one she wanted to share all her news with first.

2. We talked about some areas where we felt incredibly separate. He looked at me and said, “I am very afraid that our relationship will not work out or will go further. I don’t want to lose you!”

3. When D left some toiletries at my house, I had an “a-ha” moment. At the time I didn’t know where we were, it was a simple sign to me that things were getting a little more serious.

4. I really liked her, but she didn’t give me the time of day. I felt like she was out of my league. Four years later, we were dating some friends that we both knew from our sophomore year. They started making fun of us, they said we always seemed like a couple. He leaned in and kissed me on the lips. It was very passionate. I knew it at that moment. He’s a shy person by nature, I would never have done it if he didn’t love me.

5. I honestly don’t know when I knew for sure. M. knew he had a past before we met. All the men who have ever loved me, including my father, abused and abandoned me. M. goes out of his way to make sure he will never leave me. And I believe him with all my heart.

6. We didn’t have big schedules and neither of us was in a rush to get our relationship going anywhere. We focus a lot on getting to know each other, spending time together, and talking. One day we both looked at each other and we knew it. It’s like when you open the door and you know you are home.

7. It was when he told me that he had reserved a space for my things in his closet. That told me that he was comfortable sharing his space with me.

8. Valentine’s Day. I asked him if there was anything he wanted to say or wanted to hear that hadn’t been said. She said “I love you”. I said “I love you more”. Neither of us had said that to the other and we had been together for more than two years.

Simply put, there is no single time period for someone to fall in love. Some people “know” that the person is right for them as soon as they see him (love at first sight). Some of these men and women who fell in love “at first sight” report having felt an inexplicable sensation of having met the person before (soul mates). That knowledge of thinking / feeling is confirmed by more information gathered after knowing the person for some time.

It would be really nice if we were all so lucky that someone fell in love with us at first sight, but that doesn’t happen to the vast majority of people in this world. For the rest of us, you can’t rush love. Love takes time. How long? No one can say for sure. All you can do is nurture the feeling of attraction and help the other person go through the stages of infatuation. How quickly they can do it depends on the person and their problems.

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